K.I.S.S.—Keep It Short, Stupid. If your child really has a hard time getting her hair brushed, keep it short. It’s simpler.
Wash her hair every other night, using both a kids’ shampoo and a separate kids’ conditioner. (To minimize annoyance with the process, put the shampoo on first, then the conditioner, and rinse only once.) This should make it less unruly.
If your child has curly hair, wash it only two or three times a week. Apply conditioner (no shampoo) or a no-suds shampoo.
Use a “no tangle” spray to reduce the formation of knots.
Seek expert advice. Ask your hairdresser which type of hairbrush will work best for your child’s hair type to minimize pain.