Teach your child to use words to express her feelings. When a tantrum occurs, say, “I don’t understand what you want when you’re crying like this—take a few deep breaths and tell me.”

Whenever possible, involve your child in decision making—if not about what to do, then at least how to do it. For example, she doesn’t get to decide whether or not to take a bath; she gets to decide whether it’s a bubble bath or not or what toys to take.

Always give your child ample warning when changing activities. Since kids have no real concept of time, saying “we’re leaving in five minutes” may not be meaningful. Instead, try, “We’re leaving at the end of this song.”